Nobody liked your project idea, so we are not going to give you any funding. The first version is a weaker statement, emphasizing facts not directly relevant to its point. The second version provides the information in a simple and direct manner. But you don’t need to be an expert on style to know that the first phrasing is diplomatic and respectful (even though it’s less concise) as compared with the second version, which is unnecessarily harsh and likely to provoke a negative reaction.
Similar to business or employment_related correspondence, military correspondence also has set standards for the closing (also called a “valediction”) which one should present before one’s signature. If your company conducts business with the military – or if you are applying for a job in the military – you should be aware that “Very Respectfully” (often abbreviated as “V/R”) is used in written and emailed correspondence between military members.